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【No. 0312】Suspicious Individual

Oct 26, 2015 10:51
Yesterday my physical condition was bad, so I slept after I went shopping and ate lunch.

Then the intercom rang, and the door opened while I was going to the entrance.

No doubt I forgot to lock the door.

I was very surprised because a stranger tried to enter my room.

The man also looked surprised, and he said "sorry, I made a mistake," then he left.

I was a little scared.
不審者

私は昨日体調が悪かったので、買い物に出かけてお昼ご飯を食べた後寝ていました。

するとインターホンが鳴り、なんだろうと玄関に向かうと、扉が開きました。

買い物の後、鍵を閉めるのを忘れていたようです。

扉からは見知らぬ男が入ってこようとして、驚きました。

男も驚いている様子で、「すみません、間違えました」と言って去って行きました。

ちょっと怖かったです。

Corrections (2)

No. 1 Nameless
  • Suspicious Individual
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • Yesterday my physical condition was bad, so I slept after I went shopping and ate lunch.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • Then the intercom rang, and the door opened while I was going to the entrance.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • No doubt I forgot to lock the door.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • I was very surprised because a stranger tried to enter my room.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • The man also looked surprised, and he said "sorry, I made a mistake," then he left.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • I was a little scared.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
Toru
Thank you very much for checking my post! :D
No. 2 Chris
  • Yesterday my physical condition was bad, so I slept after I went shopping and ate lunch.
  • Yesterday I didn't feel so well so I slept after I went shopping and ate lunch.

    "my physical condition was bad" sounds very clinical, or stiff. "I didn't feel so well" sounds much more natural in this context.

  • Then the intercom rang, and the door opened while I was going to the entrance.
  • Then the intercom rang but the door opened while I was (still) going to the entrance.
  • No doubt I forgot to lock the door.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • I was very surprised because a stranger tried to enter my room.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
  • The man also looked surprised, and he said "sorry, I made a mistake," then he left.
  • The man also looked surprised, and he said "sorry, I made a mistake," then he left.
  • I was a little scared.
  • This sentence is perfect! No correction needed!
Toru
Thank you very much for correcting my post! :)

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